INFJ personality types and INFP personality types both have the common fear of being seen by others. Both INFJ personality types and INFP personality types also crave being seen by others. We most often experience a fear of being seen because on some level we know that to be seen is also to be “mis-seen,” which means that other people will attach their stories and projections onto us.
Because INFJ personality types and INFP personality types tend to be internalizers (meaning we internalize most things and blame ourselves for most things) we also tend to take responsibility for the projections of others. If someone misunderstands us, or judges us unfairly, we feel this very acutely, and we also feel the need to fix it, or to correct their judgment. When we take our place in the spotlight, it become impossible to make sure that every single person sees us accurately and does not project anything onto us.
Part of becoming comfortable with being seen is to understand that being seen is a learning process. It is not something that happens all at once. In order to heal our wound of not being seen, we must take baby steps and move out of our comfort zone little by little. We must experiment with each new level of being seen by people, and practice detaching from the stories and the projections they put on us. The more we can detach from others’ reactions, opinions, and stories, the easier it will be for us to let ourselves be seen by others.
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