Celebrate 2014 with our West Ham United Christmas poem, written by Michael Symons.
TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS XIV
Twas the night before Christmas, the Bridge lay in wait
As Jose would say for a Victorian date.
How Big Sam had beamed when West Ham kept it clean,
Some 39 shots and no breach had there been.
So much more than a point, the tide had now turned
Good riddance to January and harsh lessons learned.
Fulham, Forest and City might’ve doused New Year hope,
Resolutions in Cardiff, no slippery slope.
The Big Man back playing, our Samson reborn,
Twice teeing up Nolan, again the Swans’ thorn.
But Chico was victim to a flailing right arm,
Howard Webb brandished red, Flores’ hair suffered harm.
The first of fab four in a February feast,
12 points safely gathered, relegation fears ceased.
Momentum still building, another 2-0,
With generous Villans, Kev went for the kill.
Norwich City were stubborn, it took a late show,
84 ‘til the breakthrough, Ginge landed the blow.
The Saints they came marching but could not compete,
From Premier League peril, to tenth, what a treat.
All runs have to end and this did in some style,
Three losses to follow, 14th in the pile.
No reason to panic, a wobble, that’s all
And Hull had the good grace to cushion the fall.
The Mackems did likewise, themselves on the brink,
Six points in five days, home and hosed you would think.
Thank heavens for Tottenham, with a flourish we’d end,
No stopping Man City, their crown to defend.
A short-list drawn up, let the shopping commence,
Our ambitions made clear, top ten, no pretence.
Zarate, Kouyate and Aaron Cresswell,
Diego then Enner, the squad starts to swell.
Not done by a long shot, four more through the door,
In Jenko and Sakho, there’s promise galore.
More business to do but first football intrudes,
The Pheonix and Sydney the exotic preludes.
Day one best forgotten, a late Tottenham raid,
Up and running at Selhurst, the Eagles outplayed.
Hero’s welcome for Alex, still singing that Song,
Then deadline day Morgan, to the window, so long.
At Hull a new dawn, Enner’s bolt from the blue,
A glimpse of the future and Sakho scored too.
The Reds, under pressure, walked into a storm,
We’re two up in seven in glorious form.
All the while down at Stratford, the roof’s going on,
Club London came calling, so many seats gone.
On the Stadium bowl work continues apace,
A home soon to be ready, our Champions Place.
Tough luck at Old Trafford, a hair’s breadth away,
Kev slid in to level, the lino said nay.
Diaf breaking records, he scores when he wants,
His fifth against Rangers, one more off his bonce.
All hail our full-backs the scourge of Turf Moor,
Three crosses converted here comes the top four.
Man City then ambushed outfought and outthought,
The Boleyn Ground rocking, fresh havoc we’d wrought.
Our own diamond Downing now pulling the strings,
With licence to roam he’s got more than just wings.
Outstanding at Stoke, Stewie hauled West Ham back,
Reclaiming his place in the Three Lions pack.
Edged out by the Toffees, just two points from nine,
But Aaron's cool finish stopped any decline.
A new winning spree and it’s comebacks all round
Resolve in abundance the Hammers had found.
Heads up at West Brom, Kev and Tonks off the mark,
Redemption for Andy, his double the spark.
We’re top four for Christmas, all Hammers rejoice,
The Claret ‘n Blue army in fine festive voice.
Our best start for decades, what a squad we’ve now got
The race truly on for a prized Europe spot.
Hard work to be done but we’re up for the fight,
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.
