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About This Video:

Fear of rejection is a feeling that can impact all areas of your life. Maybe you experience some nerves in situations where you could potentially be rejected, or perhaps the fear has become crippling, to the point where it’s affected how you pursue your goals. There are a number of underlying causes that can result in this fear, and when left untreated, it can become worse over time.

People-pleasers are especially prone to a fear of rejection. So many people struggle with the idea that someone might not like them if they don’t please that person enough. They tend to do whatever it takes, or say whatever they need to say, to get the other person to like them. Their fear of rejection keeps them from telling the truth and getting what they want.

We are born with a fear of rejection. It’s primitive. In the past, we feared being rejected by the group because the group is what kept us alive. In our brain, that rejection was equivalent to death.

Our brains are wired to be part of a group, so when we see someone being rejected, our natural instinct is to assume there’s something wrong with that person. In primitive times, it meant someone was sick, wasn’t going to survive, and needed to be left behind. This feeling has evolved with us today.

For instance, many of us went through high school terrified of being rejected by the popular kids. Because of this, it became easy to reject ourselves ahead of time as a way to self preserve. We might then avoid putting ourselves out there or even interacting with people we might actually want to be friends with.

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