Not much is harder than figuring out how to love your partner in all their messy humanness—and there’s also not much that’s more important. At a time when toxic individualism is rending our society at every level, bestselling author and renowned marriage counselor Terry Real, MSW, LCSW sees how it poisons intimate relationships in his therapy practice, where he works with couples on the brink of disaster. The good news: Warmer, closer, more passionate relationships are possible if you have the right tools.

In his transformative new book, Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship, Real brilliantly observes how our winner-takes-all culture infiltrates families with devastating results: repetitive fights that go nowhere, or a distant relationship in which partners end up living “alone together.” With deft insight, humor, and charm, Real guides you to transform your relationship into one that’s based on compassion, collaboration, and closeness. Us is a groundbreaking guide to a new science-backed skillset—one that will allow you to get past your knee-jerk reactions and tap into your wiser, more collaborative self.

Real is the bestselling author of I Do’t Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression and How Can I Get Through to You?: Reconnecting Men and Women. He has been a practicing family therapist for more than twenty years and has lectured and given workshops across the country. In March 2002, Real founded the Relational Life Institute. His work has been featured on NBC Nightly News, Today, Good Morning America, and Oprah, as well as in The New York Times, Psychology Today, Esquire, and numerous academic publications.

Real will be in conversation with Alexandra H. Solomon, Ph.D. (FAN ’20), a licensed clinical psychologist at The Family Institute at Northwestern University who is also on faculty at the School of Education and Social Policy at NU. She is the award-winning author of two books, Taking Sexy Back and Loving Bravely.

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