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Why it’s so lonely being an INFJ is a problem that many INFJs deal with, and that has no easy answers. Part of it is that INFJs are very good at observing other people and figuring them out, but they tend to mask their true selves and so they remain unknown and an enigma to others, even those others who might be close to them. INFJs also tend to internalize their constant loneliness as a belief that something is wrong with them, or that they are defective in some way. This results in most INFJs struggling with low self-esteem, social anxiety, and a general feeling of being misunderstood and alienated in the world. INFJs are extremely unconventional thinkers, and most other people, they get a glimpse underneath the surface, find them eccentric and even puzzling.
INFJs have a deep craving to be truly seen by others and appreciated for who they authentically are, and the gifts they bring to the world. However, most other people are unable to meet this need for the INFJ. Partly because they cannot go as deep as the INFJ personality type can, and also partly because the INFJ blocks themselves from trusting others or allowing themselves to being intimate or vulnerable with others. This block is the result of the INFJ’s past experiences, which are detailed in this video. Once the INFJ personality type can become aware and conscious of this block they have in place against trusting others, the block can be worked with and dissolved and the INFJ can experience greater happiness in their intimate relationships, and with people overall.
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