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If you grew up with parents whose moods were unpredictable, you may have developed a superpower to guess what people are feeling, and then to try to BE the person that will make them happy. For a lot of people who were abused and neglected in childhood, THIS is the pattern of how they connect -- wondering what the OTHER person wants, and figuring out how they can BE that. But of course, that’s not an energy that any sincere person is attracted to. Healthy people fall in love with who you REALLY ARE. If you’re not able to be yourself – or you don’t even know who you ARE – you might be able to attract partners for a little while, but before too long, the fact that you conform to what you think they want – is not going to feel good to them. And they pull away. In this video I respond to a letter from a woman who is grieving the end of another relationship.

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