Featuring: Sameer Samudra

"By middle school, I knew I was gay. Growing up in 1980s Pune, I didn’t have the words to express my identity. After years of struggle, I finally came out to myself at 25. A burden had lifted off my chest.
I had moved to Indiana for work when I met Amit on an online chat; I was 28. He was a student in Ohio & as a closeted person, talked to me under a fake name for 3 months. When he finally told me his name & that he was Maharashtrian like me, my first reaction was-‘We could’ve spoken in Marathi all this while!’
In 2003 we began dating long distance & 2 years later, moved in together. That year, my parents visited me in the US. They liked Amit but knew him as just my housemate. In fact, Aai urged Amit to convince me to marry a girl & settle down.
One day, she & I were in the kitchen when she brought up marriage again. I couldn’t take it anymore & blurted–‘I’m gay!’
‘Are you chakka?’ she asked, stunned. Through tears, she broke the news to Baba. Surprisingly, he said, ‘Beta I’m there for you no matter what.’ Aai wasn’t as supportive; what followed was endless meetings with astrologers & therapists to ‘cure’ me.
In September 2010, Amit & I decided to celebrate our love through marriage. Neither of our parents came but my sister stood beside us & organised a beautiful traditional ceremony. Our wedding had an ‘equality’ theme; both of us exchanged mangalsutras & had a mutual kanyadaan.
4 years later, Indiana legalised gay marriages–Amit & I were officially husband & husband! Our story as the first Indian married gay couple was viral. The hate we got was unprecedented! Emails upon emails from Indians abused us: ‘You shamed the country’, ‘You didn’t get a girl so you became gay?’ We feared for our safety but knew the law if anything untoward happened.
Amit & I were in India during our anniversary this year. My family, now accepting of us, regretted not attending our wedding a decade ago ago & organised a lovely homecoming celebration for us.
It took Aai 10 years to come to terms with reality. Today, she loves Amit more than me! The two spend hours talking over chai & god forbid if I ever complain about Amit to her, because she’s always standing in his defence."

свернуть