© BBC TELEVISION 1981

So many years later, it's surprising just how little has changed in the news stories... There's another victim (President Reagan) by a nutter in the US which causes the gun control lobby to call for further restrictions, people are striking because of higher cost of living (especially energy), a cheating MP is linked to paedophilia (he exposed a paedophile ring) and girls in New Zealand want to look like Princess Di. Strangely, they don't look like a pile of blood and flesh mangled in a car crash in a tunnel that had just been gang-banging in a minefield!

And if you thought April Fool's jokes were supposed to stop at noon, Lord Torycroft has a surprise for you... wait, you're telling me the untreated shite spouted in this Party Political Broadcast is *real*??

Headlines:
- Reagan is up and walking after the assassination attempt two days earlier
- John "Nutter" Hinckley who shot him is creepy stalker of Jodie Foster
- Andrew Pike has espionage charges against him dropped
- Meat rationing introduced in Poland (part of this had to be edited out due to a copyright claim that blocked it worldwide)
- EEC proposes to sell more cheap food to Poland
- Civil servants step up pressure for higher pay
- National Economic Council meeting discusses high energy prices...
- Contract to build Torness and Heysham nuclear plants is won by Northern Engineer Industries Group in Gateshead
- Catalytic Engine invented
- Legal problems trying to extradite Ronald Biggs from Barbados to the UK
- Geoffrey Dickens MP decides to abandon his “other woman" and go back to his wife
- New Zealand girls dress up like Princess Di... without the car crash/gang-banging in a minefield bit.

End of Take The High Ground
BBC1 trailer: Eurovision Song Contest 1981
BBC2 weird slide: Rhoda
BBC1 slide: Sportsnight
BBC1 clock (thinner hands version) (09:00pm): Count The Lies competition (at 4:00 - Well there will be a reduction in industrial stoppages! It's 1981 and millions don't have jobs to be able to strike in the first place, you moron!)
BBC1 clock (thinner hands version) (09:05pm): BBC Nine O'Clock News
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End of BBC Nine O'Clock News
Weather forecast with Jim Bacon
BBC1 trailer: A Spy At Evening
BBC1 slide: Are We Being Served?
BBC1 mirror globe: Sportsnight

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