A hellish rollercoaster where I show you around the flaming fever dream that is Genshin Impact.
The original song is Welcome to the Internet by Bo Burnham, I reused the instrumentals and wrote the lyrics of this parody myself.
LYRICS:
Welcome to Genshin Impact!
Glide around the world
Duel with a samurai or punch a hilichurl
We'll travel, and battle, unravel the lore
Of a gacha system that is flawed to its core
Welcome to Genshin Impact
Amber is a meme
Here's a list of 18 reasons you need Bennett in your team
There's lawyers, and catgirls, and murderous gods
3 dogs and 7 different overworked broads
Welcome to Genshin Impact
Here's a chest of loot
All these artifacts are worthless but those primos are a beaut
Pull children! Pull waifus! Pull men and pull twinks!
I'm only joking here's a claymore that stinks
Welcome to Genshin Impact
This quest is so cute
Just watch Paimon talk for hours 'cause the Traveler's a mute
We've got wolf-gods and dragons, they're so fucking hard
Worry not you'll beat them with your mom's credit card
Welcome to Genshin Impact
Log on, do your chores
Spend your days and nights just staring at your arsenal of who-oolesome and very nice characters!
They just teased some more,
Gotta get them even though you'll only use 4
Here's the latest trailer, hey that girl is kinda cute
She's the 7th one to wear this weird-ass skintight bodysuit
Do some wishes, get some bitches
Go ahead and spend your riches
Scratch those itches 'til your wallet is as dead as Crimson Witch is (too soon)
Welcome to new players! Oh, I'm sorry for your loss
Speedrun 20 months of content just so you can grind a boss
Should I pull for Ganyu? I am on the fence
Watch this perfect artifact roll into flat defence
Could I interest you in primogems all of the time?
A little bit of primogems, 5 at a time
Save up for a month, you might be luckier this time
When you spend all of your primogems at the same time
Look, you're missing out on primogems all of the time
Play this limited event, hunt down a slime
Banner's almost over and you haven't spent a dime
Why not refill all your primogems... just this one time?
