Minka Kelly Reveals Details From Her Traumatic Childhood in New Memoir: 'I Carried a Lot of Shame'

Even as a seven-year-old girl, Minka Kelly knew her life was "different." Living in Los Angeles with her single mom, Maureen, who worked as an exotic dancer, Kelly and "Mo" struggled with poverty. At one point they even stayed in a storage shed of an apartment complex after not being able to pay rent for their unit. "I spent a lot of my youth wishing my mom was something she wasn't, wishing she was like the other moms," Kelly, 42, tells PEOPLE exclusively. "I only was able to really appreciate how special she was when I got much older. In fact when it was maybe a little too late."

In her upcoming memoir, Tell Me Everything, Kelly opens up for the first time about her traumatic childhood, watching her mom try to make ends meet as she faced addiction and domestic violence. Maureen, who died of cancer in 2008, often took her young daughter with her to Crazy Girls strip club in Los Angeles where she performed. "If she made a lot of money that night, we'd go grocery shopping at 2 a.m.," the actress recalls. "My childhood was colorful and chaotic, unstable and inconsistent, unpredictable and hard a lot of the times. But the silver lining is that it made me a very adaptable person." In the first pages of her book, Kelly reveals she performed in peep shows at an Albuquerque adult-video store when she was 17. Having been shuttled around between family friends and acquaintances while her mom left her for weeks and months at a time, Kelly was determined to try and support herself.

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