Release date
December 23, 2015
Producer(s)
ORBT
Lyrics
[Verse 1]
Lately I've been looking for myself
I'm just trying to find some happiness
Wish I never lost my innocence
In the middle of a sicker struggle
I'm dependent on a different feeling I can only find it with a milligram
And Imma need some more for my tolerance and
That's way higher than my confidence
Became introverted I don't speak and I can't sleep I been so stressed
What if the plan do not pan out?
All the time that I'm putting in
Wasted energy upon the dream and I can feel the fate as I begin to flow and I have been sedated for a couple months cause I am too depressed about a lot of shit
Life ain't going like I thought it would. realizing I'm a lost cause, pray to god that I can find some peace I need the recipe you know the formula to get a normal life
I stay isolated can't trust a soul I don't feel love its like the only ones that ever cared about me these different drugs so I choose to use them I mixed them up
I need variety and I'm an outcast of this society with no three stacks and no Lucius left just loose morals and a ton of pain
Plain to see that I can never change start the fire Ima let it burn feeling low I know I need help
Headed to a safe place, can you relate to my predicament?
I'm in vicious cycle but it never ends I might get clean for like a few days
But Its a constant struggle I need strength, I dont have faith, and I'm insecure
A self conscious man that feels agony
I can't fill the void in my fuckin heart
But I'm terrified and I'm paranoid
I know I had the choice of positivity and my potential was a promiscuity but realistically
I am a weaker person persecute the soul I execute the purpose of my self destruction I don't have a conscious in a constant battle
But its mentally I need to find a better outlet lost in the dark space damn!
LAWD
Talking about the pain that I repress I'm in mutual relationships everyday, and I've been living straight by addiction but they can not understand the reason why I do it
I am feeling like everyone else is against me I carry a chip on my shoulder as long that's holding my head to the ground but I'm lower than ever
It never gets better I bet they maintain I'm the perfect example of wasted potential
Not to mention all of my opportunity's are passing, can not commit to sobriety prior to pardon my etiquette
We make it darker to see what the message is affirmations alegated repetitive
Pacing myself on the why can't I and I do it
I come for oblivion I'm covering agony
Masterpiece that was inspired by misery
Living my life and I live for a muse
Focusing something I like at the the moment
I'm vulnerable I am a loner insisting I see what it is
I get the sense that these people are fake
I'm disconnected, I have no emotions
I'm heartless I've started to realize there is no hope
I am inspired by nothing I notice the smoke in the mirror's the sight of the sober
The flight that I'm on it was artificial, disappear into disparity, and everything that we are given is realistic It’s depicted inside of my mind the minute I think half of my thoughts
I'm moving on salutations from a better bond
I do not feel like the person I was or I used to be I know my purpose is gone
Pray that I can become mentally strong
I'm holding on but I know that I'm finished
Empty inside man I need to replenish
I said that I'll quit but I'm back on that shit and I sit by myself feeling disappointing but it's really pointed that I'm pointed out
Conversations with nobody else, at my lowest I sincerely know it I'm a lotus flower in the concrete
Dirty pedals and a crooked stem but when I needed friends
Man I could never find em so I find my reality when I hallucinate, losing myself I can not get a grip of my self esteem man that no longer exist
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