Anxiety disorders are the most common mental disorders worldwide, affecting about 300 million people, according to WHO. The good news is they’re also among the most treatable disorders.
“This is a fundamental misunderstanding about social anxiety. It is not about a preference. When we think about preference for socializing, it’s more akin to introversion … Anxiety is about a fear of the social interaction, a fear of the evaluation and rejection,” said Dr. Fallon Goodman, an assistant professor of psychology at the George Washington University and director of the Emotion and Resilience Laboratory.
Despite fearing these interactions, people dealing with social anxiety are still happier when they’re with other people socializing rather than when they’re alone.
“We, as humans, whether we like it or not, are social, interdependent creatures,” Goodman said.
Goodman offers some practical tips leading up to social interactions. One is to expect “you will not be perfect and you will mess up.” Also, she says to physically calm down the body by taking deep breaths.
“When you’re feeling socially anxious, we turn our spotlight inward. We think, Oh, how am I speaking? How am I sounding? What are they thinking? As best you can, focus your attention outward. What is the person doing with their eyes, their mouth, their ears, their nose? How can I focus on what they’re saying and not how I’m feeling?”
People do get better with exposure, practicing social skills, and challenging their thoughts, Goodman added.
“On the other side of that is a life that’s rich and filled with positive experiences and wonderful social relationships that can lead to a life that feels so much more full than a life of isolation or fearing those social relationships,” she said.
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