Treatment for alcohol and drug problems is far more accessible these days. Most GPs and healthcare providers have both the training and resources to spot problem drinking and drug abuse, and to offer helpful interventions. The NHS provides counselling, support services, even detox programmes and rehab services. Addiction of all sorts – alcohol, prescription drugs, food, gambling, on-line addictions, is thought to affect one-in-three of the UK population. Thanks to a destigmatisation of addiction, many of us have a friend or family member “in recovery”. What happens, though, when a partner is affected by addiction? What happens to a relationship when one partner is using drugs, alcohol or other behaviours addictively? At LoveRelations, the specialist relationship psychotherapy practice, we see a large number of couples whose relationship is adversely affected by alcohol or drugs. It can be hard to approach, in the therapeutic process, when the drinking or using partner maintains that “they are fine”, that the only harm done is to themselves. In many cases, the alcoholic or addict seems to function well on the outside. Often he or she holds down a job, pays the household bills, is sociable up to a point. Dr David Perl, founder of LoveRelations, and specialist relationship psychotherapist, maintains that “functioning well at work” is a dangerous smokescreen when it comes to relationships and prevents many partners looking at their drinking or other addictions and the damage it causes to their personal lives.
