This real interview with the real Gwyn & Martha took place on my bed in my bedroom, for reals.

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Just in case you don't have a google alert on GP (??), the sitch is that Martha Stewart "slammed" Gwyneth Paltrow in Porter magazine, telling her to "be quiet" and that if "she were confident in her acting, she wouldn't be trying to be Martha Stewart." Kinda weird if you haven't heard, because it was a big headline. People really love this shit. But it was covered by FOX news, CBS, E!, Entertainment Weekly, Huffington Post, Slate, and of course all your trash pop sites you look at when you should be going to sleep. Basically, Here's the backstory: Martha Stewart IS homemaking. Yes, she went to jail. That makes her even more incredible! If Gwyneth Paltrow could just go to jail for a couple months, her media problems would be solved. We all want to see her go to jail. But instead she's building her "lifestyle" blog, GOOP, which has incredible pictures and inspiring words about things and places we can't afford. What I really want to express, though is that I love Gwyneth Paltrow. I really do. I feel as though, wow, I REALLY probably didn't get that message across in this video. When I danced with Gwyneth Paltrow to Beyonce (Destiny's Child, but really, c'mon, we were ONLY dancing to Bey) - I felt like i showed my love and our connection there. I also love Martha. But she doesn't, like, care. She doesn't NEED my love, or anyone's love. Not like Goopy. Which is why I think it was kinda mean for Martha Stewart to just do that, unwarranted except for a buildup of annoyance that we all understand. Which is why I organized a public apology. of Sorts.

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